


I Want You To Know

by StarkRogers135



Series: Angel!Dean Winchester series [56]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Character Death, Dean Feels, Dean in Denial, Fallen Angels, Fear, Fear of Death, Hurt Dean, Implied Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Lucifer | Nick, M/M, Minor Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Pain, Powerless Dean, Protective Castiel, Protective Lucifer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-12
Updated: 2013-12-12
Packaged: 2018-01-04 11:19:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1080397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarkRogers135/pseuds/StarkRogers135
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas finally decides that it's time for Dean to let go of him and be with Sam again...</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Want You To Know

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS A STORY. THEY ARE NOT INDIVIDUAL STORIES. IT IS ALL ONE STORY!  
> START AT "Die Trying" AND WORK YOUR WAY THROUGH IT.  
> They are suppose to be chapters, but they were put into a Series form, sorry for not telling you guys.  
> Well, Have fun!

Dean must've had a nightmare because he woke up in a cold sweat, panting and shaking. In his and Cas's bed. Dean went into the bathroom and splashed cold water on his face, gripping the edges of the sink tightly, his knuckles white. Dean jumped when he heard Cas behind him, his body visibly tense.

"Are you okay?" Castiel frowned, hesitantly walking over and wrapping his arms around Dean's waist.

"I'm fine," Dean muttered. "You should be laying down." he murmured.

"I'm fine as well." Cas obviously lied.

"No, you're not." Dean said.

Cas sighed and leaned his forehead against the back of Dean's neck.

Dean closed his eyes tight. "Cas..." he muttered.

"You had a nightmare." Cas mumbled.

Dean swallowed thickly, narrowing his eyes to the floor, his arms a little shaky.

"What was it? It's better to talk about it than keep it bottled up. Meg taught me that." Cas looked at Dean in the mirror.

"I don't want to talk about it, Cas." Dean said shakily, shaking his head and screwed his eyes shut, feeling tears bud up in his eyes.

"When you want to, you know I'm hear, alright?" Cas kissed the back of Dean's neck before going back to bed.

Dean was gone in a flutter of wings, appearing in Sam's bedroom, invisible to everyone. Sam looked so peaceful. When Dean saw Sam's face screw up in pain, the obvious signs of a nightmare, Dean frowned and pressed his fingers to Sam's forehead, watching his brother relax into a peaceful sleep again. Dean looked up when he heard the door open, seeing Lucifer. Still, Dean was unseen, even by the Devil.

Lucifer sighed and slid onto the bed, laying next to Sam and felt the hunter curl into his side. He narrowed his eyes as he felt a unnatural energy radiating from Sam. Lucifer looked around, but saw nothing and laid back down, still weary.

"If you hurt my brother, I'm going to hurt you," Dean said dryly, glaring at Lucifer. "Dead or not."

"I may not be able to see you, but I can hear you." Lucifer mumbled low enough to not wake Sam. "I know this, Dean."

"Bullshit." Dean growled. That was impossible. Lucifer couldn't hear him...

"It's not bullshit. I'm the Devil. I can hear you." Lucifer sighed.

Dean was silent again, glaring at Lucifer hard. "Devil my ass." he scowled.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow and chuckled, "Oh. So, I have some bad news. You're going to hate it."

"What...?" Dean was hesitant as he asked.

"Sam doesn't remember you dying. He thinks you're still alive." Lucifer muttered.

Dean's chest tightened and he was gone into Heaven again. He was so stressed out that he didn't even calculate when he land but when he did, the lamp fell and shattered, making Dean jump into the corner and sank to the floor.

Cas jumped and appeared in the living room, "Dean?"

Dean was gripping his blonde hair tightly while tears fell down his face, whimpering.

Cas walked over and knelt in front of his mate, "Dean, talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

"L-L-Luci-Lucifer li-lies!" Dean sobbed, hiccuping on his words.

"About what?" Cas frowned.

"G-Go ask-ask him yourself!" Dean cried, his brown wings flaring out and wrapping his wings around himself tightly.

Cas narrowed his eyes and went down to Earth, looking at Lucifer, "What did you tell him?"

"That his brother doesn't remember anything." Lucifer sighed then grunted as he was grabbed and slammed up against the wall, waking Sam up.

"L-Lucifer?" Sam said, wide eyed. "Wha-What's going on? Where's Dean?" he whimpered.

"See?" Lucifer raised an eyebrow then coughed when he was let go.

Cas disappeared then reappeared im Heaven in the living room and looked at Dean.

Dean kept his eyes shut, repeating that it wasn't true over and over again, tears falling down his face.

"Dean, Lucifer was telling the truth." Cas frowned.

"No!" Dean cried out, covering his ears and his tears falling even harder.

"Dean!" Cas shouted and Dean's hands were restrained to his sides. "Listen to me! He knows who you are, he just doesn't know you are dead."

"L-Lucifer i-is lying..." Dean hiccuped, struggling against Cas's Grace.

"No, he is not. I saw it." Cas sighed and knelt in front of his mate.

Dean kept his eyes shut, Cas's Grace restricting Dean from bring his brown wings out and hiding in them.

"Dean..." Cas muttered.

"I-It wa-was accidental!" Dean whined. "I di-didn't mean to erase that memory when I erased his memory of being in Heaven!" he cried.

"Dean, it's okay. I can repair it." Cas nodded and put a hand on Dean's shoulder.

Dean sniffled, looking up. "Re-Really...?" he murmured.

"Yeah." Cas smiled a bit. He knew, though, if he did, he'd probably die. But he needed to make Dean happy again and that's all that mattered.

Dean frowned slightly. It was as if Dean could read Cas's thoughts. "I don't want you to die," he whimpered. "Lucifer and Gabriel can just get it through his mind."

"Dean, I can do this." Cas insisted.

"No, Cas," Dean shook his head. "It's not happening."

"Too bad!" Cas snapped.

"Cas, if you die, I'll be in pain and I will _never_ be able to see you again, dammit! You want me it be happy? That's not the way to do it!"

"I need to get you your brother back." Cas whimpered a bit.

"Let lucifer and Gabriel get Sam to understand," Dean begged, crawling into his mate's lap.

Cas frowned, shaking his head.

Dean whimpered, clinging on to Cas. "Please don't, Cas. Please!"

"It is a fifty-fifty chance." Cas looked at Dean.

"I don't care," Dean whined. "I have to be feeling you die..." he whined.

"Then so I might die. You will also be able to go to Earth when I do. Don't ask me how. It just happens with mates." Cas nodded.

"Dammit, Cas, no!" Dean snapped. "I. Don't. Want you to!" Dean sobbed.

Cas sighed then had to pry Dean off to stand and leave the room.

"Cas! Castiel!" Dean wanted to scream in anger and frustration as his mate. "Castiel, you get back here right now!"

Cas started looking through a couple books.

Dean know that Cas was in the other room in their house, the hunter obviously panicking.

Cas walked out into the livingroom with a book in hand and sat at the table, reading.

Desn looked up and a sniffled, glancing at Cas. Dean looked over at him and shakily stood, walking to Cas chair and laid his face against Cas's neck.

Cas sighed and reached a hand up to tangle through Dean's short blond hair whilst reading.

Dean sniffled slightly, tears falling down again. "Don't want you to leave..." he whined. 

Cas sat silent and moved his fingers gently, massaging the back of Dean's head, more like comforting him.

Dean kept himself awake, afraid that Cas would leave if he fell asleep. Dean wouldn't take that chance. He couldn't lose Cas again.

"Do I have to put you to sleep?" Cas narrowed his eyes.

"No." Dean said, his voice cracking.

"I think I'll have to." Cas nodded.

"No," Dean repeated firmly. "I'm not gonna sleep, dammit. I don't want you going."

"Then kiss me." Cas looked at his mate. "Like it's the last time you'll ever do it. I'll consider it."

Dean whimpered, tears in his eyes. "Cas..." he whined.

"I said I would consider." Cas nodded.

Dean took Cas's face into his hands and kissed Cas hard, tears falling down his face.

Cas whimpered a bit and kissed his mate back, tangling his fingers through Dean's hair.

Dean pressed closer to Cas, whimpering faintly into his mouth.

Cas pulled Dean close and into his lap, gripping Dean's hips.

Dean felt Cas's tongue push past his lips and teeth and allowed him to do so.

Cas licked into Dean's mouth and moaned softly, kissing him deeper.

Dean panted, gripping Cas's shirt with one hand and running his other hand through Cas's hair.

After a moment, Cas pulled away. He panted softly and cupped Dean's face, rubbing his thumb back and forth over his mate's cheek as he stood, "I love you. I hope you know that." He smiled.

"Cas," Dean whimpered. "Please don't leave me," he whined. "I'm begging you. Please!"

"Say that you love me, please." Cas looked at Dean with tears forming. "Please."

"I love you, Cas," Dean said, his voice trembling. "More than anything ever."

Cas smiled and kept his hands on either side of Dean's head, "You're going to become human. You will not be able to come back to Heaven until you die." He started explaining, hearing Dean beg for him to stop and telling him no. "You're going to be back with your brother. Do not do anything rash when you get back to Earth. Find your way back to your brother from the cemetery."

Before anything, Dean would feel excruciating pain when Cas dies. Dean shook his head, clutching Cas's wrists with tears in his eyes. "Cas, no," he whined. "Come back with me. Please, Cas. You don't have to do this. P-Please..."

Cas smiled with tears in his eyes then kissed Dean's forehead, "Goodbye, Dean." He said and heard Dean scream "no" then touched his mate's forehead, putting him to sleep.

\------

When Dean woke up, he was still in a bit of pain and in the cemetery. His eyes teared up again when he saw Cas's grave. "Cas..." he whimpered.

-

Lucifer ran his fingers through his blond hair and sighed, "Gabriel, I don't know what to do. Now, he believes it and a few minutes ago he didn't. It's like everything is back to normal now."

Gabriel stiffened. "I don't think so," he said shakily. "Cas is gone..." Gabriel said brokenly, trembling slightly. "Dean's back..."

"What do you mean he's gone?" Lucifer asked then grunted as the pain hit his chest hard and made him fall to his hands and knees. "He...He is gone." His eyes teared up and he gripped the carpet in his fists.

Dean didn't have the strength to get up. Maybe he'd wait until someone he knew came by.

Lucifer whimpered then stood and disappeared, reappearing at the cemetery.

Dean had pulled his legs close to himself, face buried into his arms and tears falling down his face as he shook. Dean felt insecure without his angel powers. He felt vulnerable and he hated the feeling of it.

Lucifer walked over and knelt in front of Dean, "Dean."

Dean whimpered softly, shaking as he leaned against Cas's grave, coughing weakly on his whimpers.

Lucifer put a hand on Dean's shoulder and transported them to the motel.

Dean just wanted to curl up and go to sleep. It knew he wouldn't be able to, though, because Cas was gone and he'd never be able to see his mate again. Dean immediately got up and went to his room, shutting the door and crawled on to the bed, curling up on himself. _Cas,_ Dean thought, tears slowly running down his face, _if you can hear me, I just want you to know that I still love you..._

**Author's Note:**

> AngelWinchester: Ugh. That was fun. This is the end of the story. Hope you guys enjoyed 56 chapters XD So many tears and laughs, but hey. It was worth it. The End, my friends. You can follow me on my main account: pyrodaggers ...I will have other stories :)


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